Driving Jessica's Taxi: We all have holes to get out of

Saturday, April 22, 2006

We all have holes to get out of

I have been thinking about my last post about Jessica all day. I realize we all have holes we need to work to get out of. For me it is the need to lose weight. I joined weight watchers 4 weeks ago. So far I've lost 12 lbs. I should be really proud of myself, but some how I am discouraged. I don't see the weight I have lost, only how much more weight I want to lose. I have to keep talking to myself, telling myself to keep fighting the good fight. If this was easy, I would have done it years ago. I gained all this weight when I was pregnant with Jessica, and she is 14 1/2 years old!!!
My other daughter, Nicole and I watched a movie last week about the life of William Carey. He traveled to India in 1793 to start a mission. His son died, his wife went crazy and he didn't lead anyone to Christ in the first 6 years. Still he is called the father of modern missions, because he kept trying. Some people joined him after 6 years, and they began to see fruit! Last year, when our family took a trip to Israel, our two daughters, Jessica and Nicole were baptized in the Jordan river by a pastor from India. Even today, there are not many Christians in India,(there are over 24 million Christians, or 2.3% of the population)! They owe their faith to William Carey, a man who never stopped trying to do what He was called to do! I don't know what hole you might need to work yourself out of, for me it is weight, for Jessica it is fear. I think the only answer is to keep up the fight!

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pot holes and pits

There are pot holes and there are pits. To this point I had never really fallen into a pit. I had no idea how to handle what was happening, no idea at all. When you run over a pot hole, it shakes you up a little. Some times the pot hole is so large, it can even cause some car damage. That would require a day or so in the shop. But a pit is different. You fall into a dark hole, and when you get up to inspect for damage, you often fall off the ledge even further down. If fact one of the scariest parts about falling into a pit is being in the dark, and never knowing when and if you have really hit the bottom. When Jessica was 18 months old she had 5 immunization shots in one day. I remember asking the nurse if it was a problem that Jessica was sick, and taking antibiotics for an ear infection. I should have used my best instincts and said "no" not today. But they were the medical professionals. I was just a first time mom. What could go wrong? But with in 4 days things went terribly wrong. It has be wrong for 19 years now. Jessica lost her voice. I thought we would just spend some time in the shop, get the car repaired and be back on our way. Instead of getting on the road, I have had the challenge of learning to live my life inside this hole...and I know now I may never be allowed to recover from that fall.